I love handwritten cards over costly gifts any day. Prefer flowers and real dates. I love those little praises and cute surprises. Oh yes, I am an old-school lover!
From swiping right to liking each other’s pictures on Instagram, it’ is easier for today’s generation to find their potential partner. The idea of love to millennials is aloof, because times have changed and we have plenty of options and people are disposable, or so we are made to believe.
Tradition love these days is relatively rare, but totally worth it and gratifying when you don’t settle for the mediocre that might be more readily available. It seeks a deep relationship, not a shallow superficial one. Is chivalrous. It opens doors for the woman. It pulls the chair out for the woman in a restaurant. Not because she is incapable of opening a door for herself. Not because she can’t pull out her own chair to sit in. But because it shows that you care about her and are considerate of her.
In the good old days the only way to interact with one another was just solely face to face meetings. Then came the postal service, which let us to send and receive letters to near and dear ones during the war or the distant travel. In today’s era of Internet, its all about online dating, where you can potentially date a person who is thousands of miles away virtually. To make matters worse there are chances of you being catfished, you can potentially fall in love with someone who you think is a 28 year old single woman from London, but in reality they could be 56 year old married man from New York.
How We Used To Love?
You meet someone, you see a spark, you make an effort to go talk to them. You express how you feel, convey and convince them. Make it official, meet the parents, get engaged and marry them, have babies. It’s not like you never fought, even though you did, you still made plans together, ate together and communicated until you made up. There was honesty, no secrets, no lies. You support each others decisions, accept each others flaws, you see a bigger picture of building a life together until your last breath. Thats a simple love story of how a boy meets a girl, falls in love and lives happily ever after.
How We Love Now?
You see someone you like, you see a spark. You decide to talk, but you stop! Wonder if this is what you want, ask yourself what if you find someone better. You scrutinise everything and let them go in the hopes of finding someone better. When you find someone, if you have an argument you tell yourself this wouldn’t have happened if you were with X or Y. You stop attending their calls to teach them a lesson, you gradually drift apart and move-on. Now you start looking for someone better and decide to keep your options open again, back to square one. You use social media to communicate your feelings, hide your emotions with an emoji.
In the old school kind of love, you typically feel an array of emotions and a spike in oxytocin, dopamine and adrenaline level, when you are interacting to them in person. Gone are the days when one used to await the phone calls and love letters. The feeling of excitement and nervousness pertaining to love, especially those from an in person interaction is now replaced by anxieties and depression mostly due to unanswered phone calls or unreciprocated feelings.
It is easier to text someone than going out. Why? We can be whoever we want. We are wearing masks we don’t want to take off. The virtual world is great. Why we need to meet in person? Is virtual life better than real life? Well that’s left for you to decide. So are you an old school type or the right swipe guy?
Here’s all about my marriage story!
I swipe right on this post